Kindness and Integrity
Believe it or not, for a co-owner of what is considered a fandom site, I rarely follow fandom news. I’m a huge Twilight fan, but I’m a Twilight book fan and most of the fandom sites are full of Twilight Saga movie and actor news and quite frankly, that stuff just doesn’t interest me. I know that’s kind of weird and most people eat up celebrity news and gossip, and so do I, just not Twilight celebrity news and gossip. Sure, great movie, teen heart throbs, good looking actors, but I’m too old to be wetting my pants over kids young enough for me to have given birth to them. It’s kind of one of my rules for living – don’t slobber too much over kids younger than my oldest.
When Twicon was very sadly canceled, it seems that I opened my eyes a little bit, just to see the news about it and I noticed something that made me very sad that I want to talk about in a minute. But first I want to say to the people who had to make the decision to cancel Twicon, I’m really sorry you faced that particular burden. I’d much rather be on this end, disappointed and sad, than to have to have been part of the group who knew that they were going to have to face a lot of fans who were disappointed and sad. I know you didn’t do this on purpose. I know that it wasn’t done lightly.
Anyone who doesn’t know how hard that decision must have been and are bitching about it all over the internet, well, they really should shut up long enough to think about it. No one would deliberately run a successful convention one year just to do most of the work for a second and third the following year and then cancel it for malicious reasons. That is especially true for a business who puts a human face on itself, like Twicon has. Becky Scoggins has borne the brunt of the firestorm that has been caused by the cancellation and I’m certain had the intent been to be deceiving, no one in that company would have shown their faces ever, never giving fans a person with which to connect this all with. Consider it. Would you put your name and face to something that you knew up front was going to be yanked out from under what has to be one of the most rabid fandoms that exists? I doubt it.
This hasn’t been fun for the organizers of Twicon and I’m sure they would have rather done anything else, but since they canceled it, I’m certain they absolutely had no other choice. Heads up, guys. I know you worked hard and just watched all that hard work go down the drain. I truly am sorry that you had to face that.
Now to the stuff that makes me sad. When you own a fandom site, even when that site is tiny, you put yourself into a unique position of power, especially when you add fan fiction into the equation. Fan fiction authors put their work up on sites like ours without any compensation. They love writing, love the characters they write, and they happily share their inspiration with us. We give them a place to express themselves, but in putting up a site, we say “we have some knowledge and understanding in this arena”. We put ourselves into the position of service provider and service providers do hold power over those to whom they provide their services, even if that power is ethereal and assumed, or only in the heads of the people running the sites.
In the psychology world, there are relationships where the power balance is skewed and therefore the relationship has to be handled professionally by the person in the perceived position of authority. Fans need fandom sites in order to celebrate their fandom ways, and in a lot of cases (not with MVF, but in a lot of cases) the fandom owners become psuedo-celebrities of sorts and are looked up to by the fans that frequent their sites, further skewing the power balance.
Because fandom owners do hold the authority in a relationship with fan fiction authors, as does any web site owner where someone else posts their stuff, those owners have a responsibility to behave in ways that are ethical and kind. When those owners behave in ways that are abusive of the power that they have taken on, it makes my heart hurt, especially when they hide behind their site and use their positions to publicly flog others. They use social networking media to mistreat authors whose writing they don’t fully appreciate, or even just to humiliate people they don’t like. It’s an exploitation of the position and it isn’t a very professional or ethical way of behaving.
When someone wants to state a personal opinion, that opinion should be stated separately of the site they own, or at least be clearly stated that it is a personal opinion and not an official stance. Imagine being an author and seeing severe criticism of your work in a public forum being bandied about by the site account. Wouldn’t it seem that the site was doing the condemning, when in reality it is most likely simply just an opinion that one person holds?
With power comes responsibility. There is the responsibility to stand as an example to others who are watching to see your behavior and possibly emulate it. There is a responsibility to the fandom, to not do it harm. There is a responsibility to yourself, to treat others as you wish to be treated, the act with integrity. Everyone has a right to an opinion and a right to express it, but there are ways to express opinions without being hurtful.
Okay, so this week, there was a lot of mouthing going on. Sorry ’bout that. Let’s make the upcoming week a much better week!
Meesh – You make valid points, and they’re very well put.
Also, I don’t think you’re weird for not following fandom news & Twilight celebrity gossip. I appreciate some eye candy, but I honestly don’t give a rat’s ass about the actors or their personal lives. In fact, I had no idea that Twicon was even cancelled.
-Kari
I’m so glad you pointed this out as it actually happened to my friend.
The two of us wrote Good Charlotte fanfics and posted on a GC fanfic site. The site eventually opened a message board and the owners ended up talking about Twilight more than GC. At the time, me and my friend weren’t into Twilight (oh how times have changed) but it didn’t bother us. At least they were posting in the right threads and we still had a place to talk about GC related things.
Well, GC’s 4th album came out and people trashed it. A LOT of people trashed it. My friend went into the “Rant Thread”-which is exactly how it sounds, a thread where you can rant about whatever is pissing you off at that moment–and did a random rant about so-called GC fans who were dissing the new album, basically saying they had no right to call themselves fans if they didn’t like the new sound and that bands change, so should the fans.
I guess the owners took offense and thought it was directed at them-which it wasn’t-and ended up completely bitching my friend out, saying a whole lot of mean shit and calling her names that I don’t remember-nor do I wish to-before banning her from the message board and then the fanfic site itself, deleting every fic she had on there. Unfortunately for her, my friend hadn’t saved any of her writing on her compi so she lost everything.
It kind of goes back to what Heather said the other day about the internet basically turning people into assholes who think they can do/say anything and get away with it, all because there’s a screen between them and their target. But I definitely agree with you, Meesh, in that some site owners have developed a sort of megalomania in a way and have taken their power too far. Which is why I’m proud to be a part of MVF and support it in every way I can. Amazing site run by amazing ladies who are kind and supportive. Doesn’t get any better than that if ya ask me.
I am a ridiculously kind person; I have a hard time writing down anything that might hurt anyone. Sometimes people think that my kindness is not genuine, but in truth, it is, you feel me? (or are you off playing with Z’s nipple rings again?)
In all seriousness, I’m grateful you had the thought to put this out there. Sometimes I see things written about people and towards fan fic authors that just makes me ill. It’s one thing if you have an opinion and constructive criticism to offer, but to outright flame people in a public forum, under your site rather than your personal profile, it is the worst kind of passive aggressive behavior, IMO. Yes, I know when you put your work out there you are opening yourself up to all sorts of opinions but no one, no matter how crappy their story might be, deserves to be personally attacked.
The Twicon situation is a perfect example. Becky stood up, faced the legions of angry fans and took a lot of heat for doing so. I understand why people are mad and venting their frustrations, but I feel like Becky’s actions were commendable given the circumstance. When I saw that people were hurling personal insults in her direction, I felt ill.
When I first joined the “fandom” I was amazed by all of the positive things that happened as a result. I, like you, would like to see a return to that phenomenon. I have too much good reading to get to to waste my time on spreading negativity, doesn’t everyone?
Okay, I’ve rambled long enough. Thanks for the post Meesh.
Still. Not. His. Arm.
Meesh, I could not agree with you more. As Peter Parker said so many years ago, “With great power comes great responsibility”. I’m so proud to co-own a site that operates under that belief.